because I think you need it...
Monday, June 8, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Do I really want to expose myself....?
Why yes, yes I do actually. No, I'm not stripping down to my birthday suit or anything of the sort. No, sorry to dissapoint, I'm actually going to reveal all in a series of blog entries posted regularly which will include my up to date weight and body measurements. Yes, thats right, I'm on a mission to cut some fat!
I will not be dieting on rice cakes, silly shakes and weight watchers cookies. I will not be throwing myself into a rigorous exercise regime which will only be followed up with a not so healthy congratulatory binge which in turn wil be followed by yet another woe is me binge later in the day. I will be eating mostly better meals, smaller amounts, snacking on fruit, drinking more water. I will not be hoeing into blocks of chocolate, eating bowls of cereal as snacks, taking one too many bread rolls at a BBQ because there ain't nothing like a snag in a white crusty bread roll!!, choosing too many of the coconut milk based curries instead of a stirfry or yummy Thai salad, eating endless slices of pizza in place of perhaps TWO slices RACHAEL with an oh so yummy salad I COULD take the time to make!!
I will be taking my baby boy for walks in the pram because I like to look at nature and houses, I like to be out in the fresh air enjoying sun, a breeze, wind, whatever as long as it's outside. Noah loves a walk in the pram, the passing trees, cars, birds sounding like they've been just about murdered screeching their high pitched melodies.
I hate exercise when it's purely done to exercise, it's boring and depressing, it's also stressful like if I don't walk for 50 minutes as I did yesterday then I must be falling off the wagon already, might as well give up now, I'm never going to lose weight, I feel down now, I'm going to go home and make toasted ham and cheese sandwiches, not one, no TWO! Then I'll feel like crap and probably begin to raid the cupboard for Adrian's snacks that I don't really like all that much but I WANT to eat!
I cannot tell you how many times I have wished I were the stresser that lost their appetite, oh no I'm getting so skinny I can't fit into ANY of my clothes!! The pain, the stress, oh drama,it is leading me to eating even less and dropping the kilos like it's going out of fashion, whatever will I do?! I envy you! Don't get me wrong, I do know that has it's downsides as well but I'd like a small piece of that...cake...I mean mentality.
As a teen I had been on the go, going here there and everywhere, by foot, by train, anywhere but home seemed to be my motto. When I had Adrian, it was no different and now I was pushing a pram and wanting to keep up a social life, without a car so off I would walk to get everywhere! I remember walking up a hill one day and my friend turned around and said that she could see abs through my clingy top, I looked down and she was right! I was so busy living an active social life what with visiting friends and boys to chase, my endless traipsing all over the place had shaped my body without me even knowing it!
My battle with weight began back in 2000, just before I met Darren actually. I was over the boy chasing, too many fruitless ventures and I thought that Adrian needed a more attentive mother rather than one that was trying to find happiness in a bunch of 'dead ends'. I slowed the social lfe right down, focused on getting more work instead (waitressing) and slowly the weight crept on. I met Darren, he wined and dined the heck out of me and drove me everywhere and I just kept gaining the kilos.
The story continues and I could go on and on through my years of severe depression, upheavals in our lives etc but that is where it began and it never really stopped despite the occasional, "Oh no a wedding is coming up, I have to lose some serious kgs!!". And then I would but I'd still leave a little there to be added to yet again and here I am in 2009, twenty-five PLUS kilos heavier. Sigh. Yes, I did just say TWENTY-FIVE kilos ok?
My weight journey is a BIG story in itself which I will tell over time with self discovery, health issues and acceptance all part of the tale but for now and to cut it short because surprise surprise I'm a bit over talking about myself for now, here are my stats...
In case you were wondering, the hair is not mine, I just like looking dickie.
Weighing in at : 82.1 kgs
Height : 156cm
BMI : 33.7 - 'Moderate Risk' also classified as Obese 1 as opposed to Obese 11 or Obese 111..woohoo, I'm only obese 1! Doing a happy, if not wibbly wobbly dance to celebrate. Sheesh, way to make someone motivated, just say the OBESE word!
I will not be dieting on rice cakes, silly shakes and weight watchers cookies. I will not be throwing myself into a rigorous exercise regime which will only be followed up with a not so healthy congratulatory binge which in turn wil be followed by yet another woe is me binge later in the day. I will be eating mostly better meals, smaller amounts, snacking on fruit, drinking more water. I will not be hoeing into blocks of chocolate, eating bowls of cereal as snacks, taking one too many bread rolls at a BBQ because there ain't nothing like a snag in a white crusty bread roll!!, choosing too many of the coconut milk based curries instead of a stirfry or yummy Thai salad, eating endless slices of pizza in place of perhaps TWO slices RACHAEL with an oh so yummy salad I COULD take the time to make!!
I will be taking my baby boy for walks in the pram because I like to look at nature and houses, I like to be out in the fresh air enjoying sun, a breeze, wind, whatever as long as it's outside. Noah loves a walk in the pram, the passing trees, cars, birds sounding like they've been just about murdered screeching their high pitched melodies.
I hate exercise when it's purely done to exercise, it's boring and depressing, it's also stressful like if I don't walk for 50 minutes as I did yesterday then I must be falling off the wagon already, might as well give up now, I'm never going to lose weight, I feel down now, I'm going to go home and make toasted ham and cheese sandwiches, not one, no TWO! Then I'll feel like crap and probably begin to raid the cupboard for Adrian's snacks that I don't really like all that much but I WANT to eat!
I cannot tell you how many times I have wished I were the stresser that lost their appetite, oh no I'm getting so skinny I can't fit into ANY of my clothes!! The pain, the stress, oh drama,it is leading me to eating even less and dropping the kilos like it's going out of fashion, whatever will I do?! I envy you! Don't get me wrong, I do know that has it's downsides as well but I'd like a small piece of that...cake...I mean mentality.
As a teen I had been on the go, going here there and everywhere, by foot, by train, anywhere but home seemed to be my motto. When I had Adrian, it was no different and now I was pushing a pram and wanting to keep up a social life, without a car so off I would walk to get everywhere! I remember walking up a hill one day and my friend turned around and said that she could see abs through my clingy top, I looked down and she was right! I was so busy living an active social life what with visiting friends and boys to chase, my endless traipsing all over the place had shaped my body without me even knowing it!
My battle with weight began back in 2000, just before I met Darren actually. I was over the boy chasing, too many fruitless ventures and I thought that Adrian needed a more attentive mother rather than one that was trying to find happiness in a bunch of 'dead ends'. I slowed the social lfe right down, focused on getting more work instead (waitressing) and slowly the weight crept on. I met Darren, he wined and dined the heck out of me and drove me everywhere and I just kept gaining the kilos.
The story continues and I could go on and on through my years of severe depression, upheavals in our lives etc but that is where it began and it never really stopped despite the occasional, "Oh no a wedding is coming up, I have to lose some serious kgs!!". And then I would but I'd still leave a little there to be added to yet again and here I am in 2009, twenty-five PLUS kilos heavier. Sigh. Yes, I did just say TWENTY-FIVE kilos ok?
My weight journey is a BIG story in itself which I will tell over time with self discovery, health issues and acceptance all part of the tale but for now and to cut it short because surprise surprise I'm a bit over talking about myself for now, here are my stats...
In case you were wondering, the hair is not mine, I just like looking dickie.
Weighing in at : 82.1 kgs
Height : 156cm
BMI : 33.7 - 'Moderate Risk' also classified as Obese 1 as opposed to Obese 11 or Obese 111..woohoo, I'm only obese 1! Doing a happy, if not wibbly wobbly dance to celebrate. Sheesh, way to make someone motivated, just say the OBESE word!
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Funky mood
Not funky like feel like breaking loose with some retro moves, just in a funk, down and out.
As always, I will be ok.
My mother is not doing so well. She has been fitting which is unusual for her despite her having lived with Epilepsy for many years now. Trivial piece of information- Epilepsy comes in different forms and my mothers to date has not been of the fitting variety. She has however, been trialling a new medication for her Skitzophrenia (yes I know, she's not a lucky bird), and I really feel that this must be the problem because the 'fitting' coincidentally began shortly after starting the new med.Anyway to cut it short because I'm not in a cyber mood of late and just don't have the energy, things have got worse to the point that she can no longer stay at home by herself as she has been collapsing suddenly and is at risk.
My father works full time so I will have her here with me for a couple of days from tomorrow onwards and after a fair bit of prompting, much to my relief, he is reaching out to everyone and seeking assistance at least for the next couple of weeks. The doctors are aware and are running various tests (more could be done in my opinion but thats a whole other story) so it's just a waiting game at the moment. This is all new so it's too early to think long term but I'm worried about where this is all leading for Mum foremost and selfishly...for the rest of us.
Happier days are ahead, I know it but for now, the funk cloud lingers..
As always, I will be ok.
My mother is not doing so well. She has been fitting which is unusual for her despite her having lived with Epilepsy for many years now. Trivial piece of information- Epilepsy comes in different forms and my mothers to date has not been of the fitting variety. She has however, been trialling a new medication for her Skitzophrenia (yes I know, she's not a lucky bird), and I really feel that this must be the problem because the 'fitting' coincidentally began shortly after starting the new med.Anyway to cut it short because I'm not in a cyber mood of late and just don't have the energy, things have got worse to the point that she can no longer stay at home by herself as she has been collapsing suddenly and is at risk.
My father works full time so I will have her here with me for a couple of days from tomorrow onwards and after a fair bit of prompting, much to my relief, he is reaching out to everyone and seeking assistance at least for the next couple of weeks. The doctors are aware and are running various tests (more could be done in my opinion but thats a whole other story) so it's just a waiting game at the moment. This is all new so it's too early to think long term but I'm worried about where this is all leading for Mum foremost and selfishly...for the rest of us.
Happier days are ahead, I know it but for now, the funk cloud lingers..
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Meeting Helene
My friend across the globe who I have never met but over time, we had developed a special friendship. We arrived at Buckingham Palace and were overwhelmed almost immediately by the crowds, how in the heck would I find Helene and family in all that?!
So we went back to our hotel and drank cocktails instead.
Ok that didn't happen. We found each other with the aid of our mobiles, it was that crowded and headed off in the direction of Hyde Park. It was a lovely sunny day, the daffodils were blooming, the birds chirping and the squirrels were out to play! We had a yummy lunch, chatted our heads off, laughed at Helene's son in a hole and at Darren's getting shirty with the 'chair vendor' dude (you had to hire the deck chairs). We all got along like a house on fire. Being close in age, Charlotte and Adrian paired off with Helene's mini laptop and enjoyed each others company. Andy was lovely and Helene was all I imagined her to be and any worries that there may have been periods of silence were forgotten, only wish we lived closer.
There are so many pictures I want to share with you so I have added a flickr tab to the right here, you can click on it and go directly to my day with Helene. I miss you already dear friend.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Mothers Day noodles
Ok well Darren said the pictures I wanted to put up were reminiscent of cat vomit so I chose a photo he agreed with. We made Spätzle! German noodles basically. I made the doughy paste, Darren cooked the noodles, grated the Jarlesburg and cut the onion. I fried the onion and put that, the cheese and the noodles in the oven together for around 15 minutes....then we ate! It was really good actually, more pebble poo in appearance then anything but tasting very much like what we had over in Ulm, Germany. Perhaps they could have been a little lighter in texture and another cheese would have been good to give a more interesting flavour, but we were proud of our efforts.
Interestingly, upon surfing the net for more tips on cooking this fine dish, I stumbled upon yet another Indian living in Germany (our host wife in Germany is Indian), who likes to cook and is an excellent photographer of her culinary skills.. http://whatsforlunchhoney.blogspot.com/2006/04/allgaeuer-kaesespaetzle-cheese.html
So using her recipe, the recipe on the noodle utensil and the Swabian recipe book our hosts gave us, we came up with our own yummy version. We liked it so much, we're making it for our Sunday lunch guests!
Interestingly, upon surfing the net for more tips on cooking this fine dish, I stumbled upon yet another Indian living in Germany (our host wife in Germany is Indian), who likes to cook and is an excellent photographer of her culinary skills.. http://whatsforlunchhoney.blogspot.com/2006/04/allgaeuer-kaesespaetzle-cheese.html
So using her recipe, the recipe on the noodle utensil and the Swabian recipe book our hosts gave us, we came up with our own yummy version. We liked it so much, we're making it for our Sunday lunch guests!
Friday, May 8, 2009
Mothers Day tree??
Yep, that's right. The boys are usually good for a last minute shop in the final hours of the day before, but this time they have gone above and beyond. They huddled in the office together wrapping presents and yelled out almost violently when I wriggled the door knob or threatened to come in. I was later presented with an apparently new Mothers Day tradition...
The Mothers Day tree
Do you think these could be mass produced and sold to Myer and DJs? Could be a hit right?
Bewildered I was, what a strange concept! And how funny are my boys, not to mention generous, check out the loot under that there 'tree'!
Darren said Adrian was really helpful and pretty much led the way with the gift shopping, saying I must have taken Adrian shopping with me before. Looking forward to unwrapping this bounty, just about rubbing my hands together with excited anticipation. Even the cats took their little baskets down to the Square for the yellow gift you can just make out on the right. And there is Noah's Ark gift wrap on one pressie from..well you guess.
The Mothers Day tree
Do you think these could be mass produced and sold to Myer and DJs? Could be a hit right?Bewildered I was, what a strange concept! And how funny are my boys, not to mention generous, check out the loot under that there 'tree'!
Darren said Adrian was really helpful and pretty much led the way with the gift shopping, saying I must have taken Adrian shopping with me before. Looking forward to unwrapping this bounty, just about rubbing my hands together with excited anticipation. Even the cats took their little baskets down to the Square for the yellow gift you can just make out on the right. And there is Noah's Ark gift wrap on one pressie from..well you guess.
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